How to communicate with your partner before going long-distance

My partner and I started dating when we were 16 years old. For the first year of our relationship, we lived in the same city. We went to different schools, but saw each other during evenings or on weekends. We grew up together and graduated high school at the same time. 

Then it was summer vacation. We spent every day together, going on dates and relaxing at home. In the summer months, we tried to ignore what was to come—which I do not recommend—I was moving 5 hours away, and he was staying at home. We agreed to do long-distance, but neither one of us wanted to say goodbye.

Talk, talk, talk!

Before the distance begins, talk with your partner about it. Don’t just push your feelings down deep inside. Express your thoughts about your concerns so you can talk about it as a couple. 

That goodbye was hard. I was leaving my partner, my safety net. I remember our hug before I left. It felt so comforting to be held in his arms. I never wanted that hug to end. 

I have always been an independent person, so the long-distance wasn’t hard at first. I enjoyed having my own time.

As the days turned into weeks and weeks to months, the distance became harder. I missed being in his arms. I missed talking with him face-to-face. 

My biggest piece of advice to anyone in a long-distance relationship is to communicate with your partner. I wish someone had told 16-year-old me about the importance of communication in a relationship. 

Both partners in a relationship have to be able to communicate their feelings with each other. If not, no issues will ever be resolved, and no one’s feelings will be heard. 

I can’t lie and say long-distance relationships are always rainbows and sunshine. They are hard. They take work and commitment. 

I had to learn a lot about communication when I moved. We couldn’t talk to each other as much because of our different schedules and that bothered me. I pushed down how I was feeling to the point where I became anxious about it. Once I brought up how I was feeling, we talked about it. That was it; no fight, just a conversation about how both of us were feeling. 

We both got caught up in our own lives and neglected each other. We agreed that neither of us had been trying hard enough to talk to each other, and we wanted to change that. We needed to pay more attention to our relationship. 

In a relationship, talk about both of your needs. What do you both want out of the long-distance relationship? 

Think of creative ways to connect

Set a time for daily phone video calls. Talk about your day and spend some quality time with your partner. Have date nights with your partner. There are so many ways you can have a date over Facetime. You could cook and eat dinner together, watch the same movie or just talk. Here are 22 Virtual Date Ideas. 

Little things can make your partner’s day. Text them good morning and good night, let them know you’re thinking of them throughout the day, send care packages to them. The ideas are infinite. I can think of so many ways you can make a long-distance relationship feel as normal as possible.

There will be bumps in the road—there are in every relationship. You are going to have ups and downs, but you are also going to create amazing new memories. 

Think of when you finally get to see your partner again, hug them and kiss them. Trust me, it is the most fantastic feeling. The moment you’re in your partner’s arms again, the long distance suddenly becomes worth it.

Feature image from file